It is by loving ourselves that we come to love others. In order to do so, here are some matters which you may want to consider as you work on practicing self-love:
#1 Look inside rather than outside. Make an inventory of your strengths and weaknesses, your uniqueness and traits. Never compare yourself. Your definition of your love for yourself is not about competing or getting the attention of others.
#2 Self-love is not about vanity. While media and consumerism has focused too much on self-love through luxury, shopping, and other indulgences, we are not after such. Self-love is filling yourself, so that you have more to share. It is never about having everything for yourself alone.
#3 Be patient with yourself. Defining and building self-love is not an overnight thing. You may find yourself pining at some past hurts or longing for a relationship – despite noting unhealthy patterns. If you are actively in the process, you can build your self-love. It is progress, not perfection.
#4 Be conscious of relationship traps. When you are filled with self-love, you tend to attract the healthy kind of relationship. So it will be a conscious effort to fall for someone simply because you want to be loved, and he said cute lines to you. Self-love gives you an inner compass.
#5 Self-love does not mean things will be perfect. You think you are better? Yes. You might think things are perfect, well, no! There is no such thing as a perfect relationship. Yet having a healthy sense of self-love will jolt you out of self-pity moments, burn-out phases, and overthinking of things. When the going gets tough in life and love, know that you have a choice to be better or bitter. Self-love will give you a mindset that you do not depend on anyone to love you more, to complete you, to heal you, or make you happy! You are enough, despite your imperfections.
#6 Self-love makes you love the beloved God made you to be. This sense will make you respect and regard your own uniqueness and bring out the best in you. If someone thinks you do not deserve to grow or pursue your dreams, go back to your own worthiness, and to the dreams God has for your life. You may lose some relationships, but at the end of it all, you have won your very self and God’s ultimate purpose for you!
When you build on your self-love, you have more have clarity with God’s direction. Make nourishing your relationship with Him, your source of love, a priority. Take care of yourself the way He cares for you, so you can give more to a real loving relationship.
Practicing self-love means taking a pause to gain a deeper understanding of yourself. This is especially true for women approaching mid-life. This is why I designed, Martha’s Pause: Re-Defining Mid-Life, a workshop curated to give the midlife experience a new meaning. It aims to help you sift through your issues and realities so you can live out the words self-worth, self-love, and self-care through midlife.
Martha’s Pause: Re-Defining Mid-Life takes place us on September 28, 2019, Saturday, 8AM to 5PM, at Miriam College Environmental Studies Institute, Katipunan Avenue, Quezon City. Investment fee is P3,300.00, inclusive of workshop kit, token, light snacks, and lunch. Early bird rate is P3,000 + free The Beauty of 40 book (until August 18). Register at: http://bit.ly/MarthasPauseRML or email familygoals77@gmail.com.